Atlanta Georgia - Week Six

The week started off lovely. Got my taxes done and in the mail, which completely monopolized my day off, but my relief at their completion can't be measured. Then on Wednesday morning, the ladies of the crew had our second of what I hope will become a periodic tradition of brunch. We went to this place called the Flying Biscuit -a delicious local breakfast in a hip spot. I am really enjoying this group of women. Just a relaxed, warm group.
After breakfast, Francesca and I headed out to the bohemian part of town called Little Five Points. I visited the area the last time I came through town and liked it enough to go back. It's full of wacky shops and cool outdoorsey cafes and stuff. The weather was perfect and we had a great day. I got Jaki a few gifts, my favorite of which was a coloring book full of nothing but vaginas. I thought that was HILARIOUS. I HAD to buy it. How often do you see a coloring book like that?? I got it at this book store where I walked in, all I saw was lesbian history and power books and I turned to Francesca and I said
"Is this just a lesbian book store?"
and she replied
"Feminist, Fran"
lol.
Like the child I am I just giggled through the whole place. So un-PC.
Francesca pointed out that they also carried reusable feminine maxipads, which I thought was very ecologically responsible, but just too much for me.

Well it's Thursday. I was half tempted to leave a post on my blog to tell you all I am checking out for a spell.
My mom went into the hospital last night. I won't go into the details of it all, but she had emergency surgery and is AGAIN having to recover from some major ailment. She is such an awesome lady. I just don't understand why, after taking care of people for over 50 years, (her dad and brother after her mom died when she was 16, and then her six children) that she just can't freakin enjoy the twilight of her years. It pisses me off. It makes me wanna shake my fists at the sky and trash my hotel room. Thank God I finished my taxes or there would be rage scattered receipts all over my hotel room.
I have been forbidden to come home. Which is so funny. As if I am 12. No matter what I do I will always be the damn baby. But my sister Mary and my Mom know me so well. So now I have to work and think every, and I mean every minute of the day - what is happening now?
how about now?
now?
Last October I was in the hospital with her and the nurses were so short staffed no one ever answered her call bell to the point where I learned how to fix her machines myself. Is she laying there RIGHT NOW waiting for someone to help her?? I am such a control freak.
Those of you who know my mom, know what an amazing human being she is. So smart. My sister told me this story today.

They have her on morphine, and she raised her hand over her head and was moving it around. Mary asked her what she was doing and she said...and I quote
"I am figuring out the volume of a sphere."
While most of us would be drooling on ourselves and seeing pink elephants in the corner of the room, my mom was working out a scientific pi equation. Mary thought she might be working out the problem on a chalk board. A teacher. Always a teacher.
Just so exceptional. I wish I had half of her intelligence, honesty, and altruistic kindness.
Anyway
I won't be writing anymore this week.
I am going to go to the Aquarium tomorrow to just stare at the fish.

The pics below I loaded up here on Tuesday afternoon. It was a great beginning of the week.

Thanks to my people, and you know who you are, who have been calling and texting me all day. What would I do without you?? I love you all very very much.
I will keep you posted.


The Extra Pics


While we were having brunch at The Flying Biscuit, I noticed on our waiter Rob's arm was written in ink "My Bitch's Bitch". That cracked me up, so of course I wanted to take a picture of it for you, but when I asked, another waiter came over and said I had to get both. Both? James, another server, came over and apparently there is something wacky goin on at that joint, cuz someone had written on him "My Bitch". I guess Rob is James' bitch and James is somebody else's.



This is the front door of this place called the Vortex, where Francesca and I stopped for a beer in the afternoon in Little Five Points. Lots and lots of tattoos in there.



They sell Brooklyn beer in Atlanta! Shut up!



This is my new buddy Francesca. She looks all sweet, but she has a great funny edge to her. And she laughs at all my dumbass jokes, so she's a total keeper. I know you are reading this Francesca, and I promise to tell my mom to give you a raise in the checks she sends so you will hang with me. giggles.

It Is Finished - Atlanta Georgia

It seemed worse than Chinese Water Torture
and I hated sitting in my room all day when it was warm and sunny outside
and I moaned and complained (out loud, mind you) to myself all day
and did everything I could to distract myself periodically
but my taxes are done

YAYAYAY!

Atlanta Georgia - Week Five

Everywhere you go, especially a new job, there is a history. That history has it's own life that you are not apart of, yet are subject to. It is difficult to try and navigate through a mine-field of bullshit that happened before you ever arrived. You can see it's influence, but reacting to it can be confusing and just plain hard.
This week has been all about past events coming to a boiling point. It starts with the old prejudice that wardrobe and hair aren't "crew". There are some stagehands who are so old or influenced by other old stagehands, who actually remember back to the 1950's when the wardrobe department on any show consisted of the wives of the stagehands. Add on to that the prejudices some stagehands have against gay men. Honestly, even if there are gay men in the carpentry department, they are viewed more as men then the men in wardrobe. I have seen this mostly on Broadway. Most of them will deny it, and it certainly isn't a blanket statment by any means, but wardrobe and hair isn't a part of the team to some of these people. We are the chicks and the fags.
I truly believe this is one of the underlying issues at work. I don't think anyone would agree with me, but they have all been in it for months and have no perspective. This past Tuesday our prop head, instead of setting up our Principal quick change booth on stage for a show THAT EVENING, decided to go deliver the company trunks to the hotel.
Now for one, I have never in my life had my trunk before Wednesday on any tour, and two, if your work is not done on deck -I am sorry, but you have no business leaving the theatre. period.
Anyway, we set it up ourselves, which was a passive aggressive wrong move, yet necessary for us to do our jobs. Kinda like adding Kerosine to a smolder when you are freezing to death. So things blew up, past grievances surfaced, meetings were held, and I was amazed at the disfunction of it all. What we all do out here isn't that hard (aside from load in at a new venue) in it's physical requirements, but the isolation of touring can really muck things up. Out here, this is your life, it's not just a job that you can leave when the show is done. I think you have to really concentrate on keeping your head or else it all swallows you up.
So what do you do with this situation?
Well, you have to find a level of acceptance. You can bitch and moan all you want, but if you know things are not going to change you have to make a choice. Either you accept it, try to work with it, and keep on your toes for the screw ups which inevitably will happen, or you make a stand that no one will listen to or care about and work yourself into a lather for nothing.
Well, you can quit too.
Things you could normally deal with and find a level of tolerance at a job become impossible because you have no sanctuary. No place to escape it.

But that's life on the road, yo.

So that is what has been going on this week. On a good note - I LOVE my hotel. I haven't done a damn thing all week because it inspires you to stay in. When I opened my door and walked in, I ooooed and ahhhed at it. Sure it's a small room, but the bed is ridiculous comfortable and it's this soothing blue and white. The bathroom is wicked small. You can brush your teeth and pee at the same time. But they loaded it up with Aveda products, which is fancy schmancy. Seriously, I haven't done a damn thing this week that couldn't happen in this room. I put up my photos and lit my candles and have been enjoying a glass of red wine when I come home. Lovely. Especially with all the drama going on at work.

The week is over and honestly, once the heat from Tuesday subsided, around Thursday, it actually turned out to be a good week. Our leading lady was pitching a fit all week about her quick change booth. We - props and wardrobe- moved the damn thing 3 times. She wouldn't come see it before the show started so we could make adjustments, and OF COURSE was never happy. Even with all the drama from the beginning of the week, all departments involved were able to work together and try to work out this issue. Stage management had a week of it with her too. Bless her. She is a tad deluded.

This is our stage management team right here! Ken, Francesca, and Jovan. They are doing shots from Sunday night's Shot Night. It was a hammerhead elxir called a Vanilla latte, which consisted of Petron Cafe (coffee flavored tequila) and Stoli Vanilla. Uh yeah, killer shot.
And these are the evil architects of said shot.
That's Cuz and Tony from the sound department and Ryan from the Carpentry Dept. We went and played pool after and I completely embarrassed myself with my poor playing. I hate that. As a girl they kinda of expect you to suck. So it bugs me when I can't pull out a decent game. grrrrrrrrr. It was fun though.

So I did nothing this week. I am doing my taxes on my day off. I have a very special and precise method of sorting my receipts. Which is, to shove them in a bag all year and dump the bag out one day in February, sort it all out, add up the totals and send them to my accountant. I know. VERY ADVANCED.

Love to all, hopefully I will get out a little and see some stuff this week.

Extra Pics:


This is my gurly table I set up in my room. All my framed photos, my Rock and Roll Hall of Fame candles, and this really groovy oil burner my friend Dana gave me. Thanks Dana!



At the hotel next door, they had this menu up. I think it is hiarlious that they wouldn't give us a rate so we could stay there, but they made this menu. That's funny.


This is a shot from stage left during Act 1. I like this picture.

Memphis Tennessee-Week Four

I just got back from our first show.
Honestly, I have no reason to complain. yes, I had to get up today (Tuesday) at 4am to go to work. Yes it was a 16.5 hour day. Yes I lost all verbal capability by the end of the show and had to use grunts and smoke signals to communicate with anyone. My feets are killing me and I feel like I was hit over the head by a blunt object.
But you know
All in all
It was a good day.
The local crew is good. Better than good. And the rest of the Spam road crew has been working since 5pm YESTERDAY. Those boys (and Vera our prop head) have worked their asses off. What is that - a 30 hour day?! Bless'em. They were great. Hats off, people.
On a day like this, you HAVE to keep laughing. Seriously, your humor has to stay right at the surface and at the ready.
Jaki, Mike and I worked hard, efficently, and had fun. I just love them so much. When it works, it works, and I truly believe this combination is so dead on. We made fun of each other and worked hard and just kept laughing. We trained our wonderful local crew - I took a risk and jumped in and trained 2 tracks I had never trained before because time was running out.

Oh my people, I can't even type anymore. I must get into my bed. You get the idea of our first day in Memphis. More to come.

It is Wednesday afternoon at this point. I slept long and deep and woke up feeling pretty good. Extremely mellow. Jaki and I went and bought a new sewing machine today. the one we have at the theater is crap. Every city I have been to so far, I have had to take valuable time out to sit and deal with it. it is 150 years old, missing all kinds of pieces, and really needs to be retired. So we did that and then went to Graceland.
The last time I came to Memphis, I didn't have time to go on a tour I just went and saw the place. This time, I took the De-luxe tour. It was so enjoyable. I suppose it would be different during the busy season. No one was there today and you could just roam around at your own pace without people getting in the way.

Before we went in we ate lunch at the Piccadilly Cafeteria. It was one of those places where you get your tray, line up with all the other hungry folks and choose what you want as you go down the line. A place like this has RULES. Thing is though there is no sign telling you what they are. So you go down the line and try to learn from the person ahead of you, but those people have been there 100 times and KNOW the rules. It turns into this high pressure thing where you know the people behind you are going to start sighing and getting impatient, like hungry people do. You get all nervous and your palms start to sweat and you wind up just pointing to things. Then the lunchlady asks you a question but you are a Yankee with an earwax issue and she is from Memphis and there is a serious language barrier.
Lunchlady : "Do you want Brayhaheada"
Me: "Heh?"
LL: "Do you want Brayhaheada"
M: " Excuse me. What did you say?"
LL: "Do you want Brayaheada"
M: "I'm sorry. WHAT??"
LL: "BREAD DO YOU WANT BREAD"
M: "Oh bread. Sure. Thanks" humilation. embarrassment. shame. Food was good though.

I was never a huge fan of Elvis. You can't help, if you are a music geek like me, to respect him, especially when you walk into a room that is floor to ceiling gold records. I always liked him though. He has always kinda reminded me of my dad. It must be the hair, I think. I loved the house. It is beautiful without being ostentatious. Comfortable and homey.


I have an affinty for this town. It is unexplainable really. The city itself is dirty. The trolley system is just useless. You can walk faster than it moves. (That is Jaki on the trolley in the pic) Homeless people abound, and are very friendly - read persistant. Beale St., while full of my favorite live music (Blues) is a bit on the trashy side from what I remember, but when I was 27 I had no problem with arrows pointing to windows that read "BIG ASS BEERS HERE". I am starting to think there is a Big Ass brand of beer, the brewery of which must be located in Large Rump, Mississippi. Nonetheless, the people are very nice here, and there is a heartbeat I like. Some places you just like.

Wednesday night's performance was a little eye opening. I got slammed at the start of the day and starting helping our awesome but molassas in August slow stitcher crank through the repairs and wound up getting buried, not being able to check my presets, which ALWAYS makes me cranky, and never asked for any help from Mike or Jaki, even when they offered. I am so quick to jump in and help out, but when it comes to me asking for help...well...let's just say I need a little work in that department. I must remember there is no "I in Team" noiinteamnoiinteamnoiinteam. there was a point in the show where I realized that if something really went wrong I would be completely screwed. It is a helpless and horrible feeling. I really have to start learning where these clothes come from and go to before and after they leave my sight. I have the changes down, but not the travelling. That way if something is missing I can know where it originated from and where it needs to be. Someone handed me a glove and thank god it didn't need to be used anymore because I had NO CLUE where it needed to be. ugh. I know all the travelling patterns for the women's stuff but I hardly deal with the men at all.

I went on my first real outing in search of some live Blues. You would think in Memphis finding live Blues would be a cakewalk. Walking into B.B.King's I was surprised to hear live 70's disco music.
Umm. No.
The fried pickles were AWESOME though! (sure you scoff now, but you take a bite into one of those bad boys and you are hooked I tell ya HOOKED!)
Suzanne, (a buddy of mine on this tour who i met on the road when I was out with The Producers) and Tim (new friend in the cast) went searching for some decent music and found it in Dr Feelgood Potts Blues Band. They were exactly what a wanted. Just this wonderful visceral sexy music. Why would anyone come to memphis to hear club music? You can hear that crap anywhere. It was a lovely evening. Just what the doctor ordered. I never learned the name of the bar we were in, but it was just a little hole in the wall.

Friday i went to the National Civil Rights Museum. Very intense. The building encompasses the Lorraine Motel where MLK was assainated, as well as the boardinghouse that James Earl Ray fired the shot from. It covers the enslavement of people as far back as the 1500's. As someone who was born after the civil rights movement of the 60's, and only remembers the riots of the Rodney King verdict, it was full of so much information that my brain is just packed right now. I can't imagine what it was like being a young adult in the sixties. It just seems like such an intensely volatile, but incredibly hopeful time period. People took risks for what they believed in. I just don't see that happening in my generation. One of the most important things I learned was that any movement is fueled by the actions of individuals. Rosa Parks wasn't a group or organization, just a woman who wanted to sit on a bus. These are things I really need to remember. I think I am just as complacent as the next person. My head hurts. If you come to Memphis and you don't go, you are really missing out on something valuable.

I still have 2 shows and a load out to do but this is long enough and if anything really exciting happens, you know I will tell you...
So farewell Memphis. Until next time!
Next Stop - Atlanta!!

The extra pics:

Jaki didn't know Elvis was buried at Graceland. I think it threw her a lil bit.



Elvis' cell phone. LOL. That is hilarious. You know he would own a Razor or a Treo now.



This venue is one of those theaters that has the touring companies paint their logo on the wall and then everyone signs it. It is really very cool. You can go through the hallways looking for your friends. I actually found myself! Ten years ago I was on the road and this is the show. You can see my name right there. Dang. I was 27 when I signed that wall. What a kid I was!



This is my friend Suzanne. She just got Botox put in her forehead. Nut. She doesn't need it. She is trying to raise her eyebrows in this picture. giggles.

Naples Florida - Week Three

It's not so much that the space here at the Philharmonic is small, which it is, but add on to that, that this is truly my first load in where I am solely responsible for teaching some tracks to the locals, add on to That with the fact that they couldn't find ANYONE to work the show because Lion King is also near by - so we got dressers who are very very very green. Some didn't know stage right from stage left. Well, I still confuse them myself all the time even though I do know what they are, but they didn't understand even the most mundane day to day references. Things like "Repairs" or " 15 Minute Call". Wow.

Sometimes I like to get people like this because you can mold them into the perfect dresser instead of dealing with some wardrobe hag who thinks she/he can improve on a system that my boss likes as is. There are theaters that make it extremely difficult, though, to really spend the time with a newbie that is needed. Trying to create a quick change booth out of an electrics storage office takes some energy.

I was expecting a really bad opening night. Of course that bar was set pretty high by New Orleans when I was on The Producers Tour. Those of you that were reading the travelogue at that time will remember the story of Springtime for Hilter, where all the preset baskets came tumbling down the stairs to land in a jumbled hellish mess right smack dab in the middle of the smallest quick change booth known to man - really a hallway. Then of course me shoving my head into a gondola of shirts, so no one would see me, and crying when it was all over.
This turned out to not even be a close second to that. It still was rough, and my training is laughable at this point. It will get better, but I would listen to myself telling this dresser what do, knowing I was only making it worse. LOL.
It could have been a complete train wreck, but the show only has one 5 minute tough section, the rest is just steady with a lot of traveling costumes (which can really muck things up if the dresser in charge of moving them has trouble.)
Anyway
It was ok. My main girl in charge of taking care of the girls can't really physically do the job. So I spent the night, helping her to keep up. She is a really nice girl. I felt so bad for her at one point. She was really looking like she was going to cry. She just wanted to do a good job. I told her to remember it is just a play and all you can do is your best. It didn't really help, but I tried. I was kinda glad she got a little upset because I was starting to get frustrated and her emotions kept me in check and reminded me that it's just a play too. Course, I will crack the whip over my own back if I screw up so make what you want of that double standard.

I think I am slowly melting the iciness I was feeling from a few people when I arrived. I will conquer them!!!!

So Naples.
Damn there are a lot of white people here. A lot of really really old rich white people.
I am used to looking across a crowd and seeing all kinds of different faces. Down here it is all the same. How boring. When I took this photo, I wanted to send it to Kricka saying that those are the men we would have to date if we lived here. Then I thought that maybe they were a couple, decided I liked them so I didn't want to mock them.

My hotel is boring...except for the shower curtain. I have been contemplating it. That's it right there. White, with a transparent swath running across it right at eye level. My first thought was that the transparent bit was there too keep people from having a Psycho movie panic attack, cuz they can see out. I thought that was very considerate of the Ramada, seeing as I periodically need to peek out from the shower to make sure no one is standing there with a butcher knife ready to send my blood down the drain of the tub.
I thought about it later though, and maybe it is just so you can have a conversation with someone. But do you really need to see someone to chat with them while you are in the shower?
No it has to be so you can see if someone is going to murder you.

I went to see the World's Largest Head of Beethoven today. What a wacky thing. It is at the entrance to this complex called Pyramid Village which seems to be this German vacation rental place. Very strange. It sits in the middle of this standard residential neighborhood. All these shiny pyramid condos.
The Head of Beethoven was kinda funny. No explanation or marker. Just his big ol head.

I drove around a lot looking at houses. I repeat, there a lot of very very old rich white people here. At one point I parked under a tree and walked down the Naples Pier (yawn) and by the time I got back my entire car was plastered with bird poop. I mean covered people. It was so embarrassing driving around. This old man in his hot red Ferrari (erectile dysfunction much?) completely cut me off and I shook my fist at him, swearing a blue streak, and then I realized I was driving a crap Chevy COVERED in seagull shit. LOL. I think that is hilarious. I couldn't take the humilation of it all and went to a car wash. The groovy old school kind where you put quarters in the slot and you move the switch to Brush or Rinse. I remember it being 50 cents. It's up to 2 bucks now. I should have taken photos of it for you. Or at least of the bird poop.

Remember when Perkins was a fine family establishment? They have them down here every ten miles or so. I had a chicken quesadilla. About halfway though the first act of our last performance here in ...( I literally had to look at the name of this post to figure out where the hell I was.) Naples, I puked up that dinner. So that was fun. If you ever come to Naples, I would skip Perkins.

I just got back from load out. All in all this crew kinda blew. We had a dresser come in today completely loaded. Drunky McDrunkerton. What is that? People are so dumb. The lady who was doing the laundry totally decimated the entire system Jaki had going. I mean just ruined it. Everything is labelled and she put #3's stuff in #6's bag. The men had women's fishnets. Jaki happened upon an entire basket of laundry. During load out she found t shirts behind a gondola that the woman had been looking for all week. Most people, even people on tour, don't realize how important the laundry system is on the road. If the laundry gets THAT screwed up it can bring the wheels to a grinding halt. Now Jaki has to spend who knows how long, opening every single bag of laundry to straighten it all out. It is an unbelievable amount of work. 25 actors x 3 bags of laundry each x 2 to 5 items in each bag = Hell.

Even with everything that happened this week with the crew, I can feel Mike, Jaki and I, really starting to create a kick ass team. It's almost like playing doubles in tennis. You have your job on the court, but you always keep your eye on the ball in case your partner needs some back up. You know, that is a perfect analogy. (pats self on back)

So Long Naples, with your crazy drunk dressers. ( I blame Lion King)
Next Stop : Memphis!!!! I am so excited! I am gonna go see Elvis' place, and try to catch some live music. I also think I might be ready to come out of my shell and venture into social situations. I will, of course, let you know how that goes!
love to all

The Pics.

Beethoven's Head...what a bust seeing that was. get it. Bust. Har har. (omg that was a total Mike joke)


This is Elaine and Mitch. They are 2/3rds of the Hair Department and I really like both of them. They have welcomed me so warmly. There is this tradition that Saturday nights after the show is "Shot Night" Anyone can host and I guess you just put them out and everyone who wants to partake does so.
This was their contribution. I believe it is was Southern Comfort/Pineapple/Orange Juice concoction which was quite tastey. Not that I would know. I am taking that from OTHER people's opinions. tee hee.

Mike (my fearless leader) modelling our Leading Lady's armor. He has to fix that thing almost everyday.


The Philharmonic House. It's pretty big and we sold out, but the audience was kinda dead. I am sure they were laughing on the inside.


Maggie - the cutest puppy in all the land. This picture has nothing to do with the tour. My friend Rhonda got her from North Shore at home a few days ago. I just think everyone should see her ridiculous adorable-ness. Admit it, you are all oooing and ahhing.

Tampa Florida- Week Two

Sunshine State my ARSE!!

It has been dreary and overcast this whole time. I felt like I was in Seattle. The weather wasn't helping my homesickness. As always, I have this adjustment period I have to go through. It used to only take two weeks, but I think it is getting harder as I am getting older. I have been out 2 weeks and I am still working on acclamating to life on tour. Even with so many buddies out here, I find myself missing brooklyn, my urban tribe, and of course, my awesome beast Mr. Man. Knowing it will pass helps a little, but the hardest times are when I am back in my hotel room, watching tv. TV shows I always watched with Kricka and JIm, when we would pause the show, discuss, and then go back. All the while Mr Man hanging with us, or sneaking up behind Kricka or I to rub his head all over one of ours. Funny beast.
So it's hard right now, but writing this blog helps. Going out to see things with this blog in mind helps. Laughing at work helps too. Some people have really embraced me and I can see that fun is on the horizon. You all know me - if I am not laughing I won't last long. But the day to day grind is starting to be a fun and good time. I know it will only get better. This is good.


The week was pretty busy. I spent most of my time in the theater, but on Wednesday some of the ladies on the crew hosted a brunch at a restaurant called First Watch to welcome me and our new stage manager Francesca. (isn't that cute? Fran and Francesca are the new girls) It was lovely and they are a great bunch of women. (Picture below)

I noticed that parked outside the theater was this RV with "SPAM" in big letters on the side. Apparently it is the Spamobile and it travels around with us to certain venues. They give out free samples of Spamburgers (wretch) and sell some swag. I decided that they needed to be a part of my blog periodically so I went over and introduced myself to Bear and Sharon. I haven't figured out what the deal is between them- if they are married, living in sin, or what. They certainly seemed nice enough and offered me a slice of their wares. Normally I would feel really bad about turning down someone's generosity, but I think if I actually put Spam in my mouth my body would completely reject it and it would launch out of my mouth. I had this imagine of trying to eat it and my stomach forcing it out of my body with such violence that it hit Sharon in the face. I didn't want to risk such humilation, so I turned down the Spamburger.
Bear mistook me for someone of importance and started asking me questions about me getting him into the show. Laughing, I told him I could help him with laundry detergent and that was about it.
Sharon told me that Spam turns 75 years old this year on May 11th.
I bet they know everything about Spam
I wonder if they know what's in it.
Nevermind I don't wanna know.

My first solo Load Out seemed to go just great. I had an attack of OCD and decided to play Tetris with the contents of all the wardrobe room gondolas (gianormous cabinets on wheels that hold everything we use). I also went nutty on the 40 million spools of thread we have and bought racks to put them on, and proceeded to put them in color wheel order (um I think I need some meds)
A good and productive week. many laughs were had by Jaki, Mike and I. I really adore them. You know the team is good when the locals wish you were staying longer. We are a very very good team - and only going to get better I suspect.
Love to you all!
Next stop- Naples Florida!

Oh yeah, after the pictures below is a story that kills me about something that happened at this church I stopped into this week. Thought I would just tack it on and those that wanted to read it could, and those that just wanna hear about the tour could skip it. I thought it was hysterical.

The Pics


Brunch with the gals at a place called First Watch. Elaine, Francesca, Jaki, Me, and Suzanne.


Bear and Sharon who roll with the Spamobile. I bet everything they own smells like Spam. hurl.

Some more Spamobile shots






The Church Story:
I had no intention of talking about church but something so hilarious happened today, I must share it.
Choir lofts have always been my favorite place to watch mass from so I snuck up there this morning and was enjoying my skybox view of the whole affair. The priest starts his homily by calling all the kids in the place up to the altar. He sits down on the little stairs and they surround him on the marble floor, accept for this one little girl. Let's call her...
Fran.
She was me at 5.
She sits down right next to him on the stairs, looking out at the crowd instead of at his feet like the other kids. I started laughing. It totally reminded me of how when I was little and it was the shake hands with your neighbor part of the mass, I would push and shove everyone out of the way so I could shake hands with the priest as he walked by our row. Even at that tender age I knew who the person to know was. LOL
Thats not even the funny part.
As I am sitting there a priest-in-training comes up and takes out a cell phone
Gasp!
I was shocked! I was all (my inside voice mind you) "What is this world coming to!!!!!"
So the priest is blathering on about how St Peter was called to follow Jesus.
and the priest in training is pressing numbers on his phone and making exasperated noises and it dawns on me as the priest at the alter starts fumbling in his robe, that his phone was supposed to ring and junior was supposed to be the one making the call.
"Oh what's that, it must be my phone" father says...even though the phone never rang "It's God calling on me"
Baby Fran says " THAT ISN'T GOD!!! IT'S YOUR MOM!!!!"
hilarious.
and then junior priest walks by, rolls his eyes and says in a completely queened out, EXTREMELY fay tone "He's so nervous he forgot to turn his phone on"
I laughed my ass off.
I don't know if that transferred in the writing but it really was a riot.

Hangalot

Oh funny.

It is rare that I can't keep my composure when things go wrong. This evening I couldn't help but laugh as a major technical glitch left our Enchanter hanging in the air.

It is a big moment. He flies in with a staff that shoots pyro, stays suspended during the scene and then makes a grand pyro exit as he flies off stage left.

That's what usually happens.

This evening, however was a lil different. It started off the same: grand entrance, funny scene. But then the stage hands go to fly him off and he gets stuck. Not just stuck, but STUCK. The poor actor is hanging there in the air. He made a good effort at first, keeping his Enchanter character going, but after about 30 seconds his shoulders slumped and he just sort of dangled there. By this time I am already giggling. The next scene is underway, and he is there, about 15 feet off the ground. He even floated a little more on stage as opposed to coming close to leaving. LOL. The cast on stage is completely starting to crack. Our Head Carpenter yells to stage management to bring in the main curtain because they can't get him down. Nobody does that and after about a full minute, minute in a half (which is a LONG time really) our head carp goes OUT ON STAGE in his sandals and shorts and slowly pulls him off by the end of his long hanging cape. I am full on laughing at this point. The audience goes crazy. They love that crap.

Hilarious.

Why would anyone want to work in movies? Shit like this never happens on set. Oh that was good. The show is such a silly spectacle that it actually worked.

(cue: grade school student center stage) "Welcome to the Tampa Bay High School Production of ...Spamalot" (curtsies)